Summer at home with kids and limited venues (if any) for outings presents a whole new playing field. For me, the greatest challenge is the lack of social opportunity for my children and I'm still creatively approaching that one. While Zoom school has not adequately replaced actual face to face social interaction, it has provided a source of connection and comfort for the boys, especially S. He has had some Zoom playdates and even though I spent countless sleepless nights pondering how kids could have a "virtual distance playdate," leave it to a couple of kindergartners to figure that one out! Just yesterday he and his friend went on several out of this world adventures via Zoom background and landed back at home an hour later, just in time for dinner!
Setting up a summer routine has often been a source and anxiety and overwhelm for many parents whether they are already at home, work from home or work out of the home. And now many parents are in the dual role of being at home and working from home while the kids are also at home. If you want to quell your nerves a bit about that, revert back to my last post before you go and make a color coded schedule for your refrigerator (unless, of course, you happen to like making color coded schedules for your refrigerator and then get right to it!). And for those of you who are ready to jump right in, or at least dabble a big toe--here's a few tips and tricks I have up my sleeve for this summer.
Planning is NOT everything. I'm saying that and I love to plan. It's a hobby, even. But it is not the be all and end all of everything. I have a general system in place and some main anchors in our routine that keep us grounded and calm. But I am also going into this knowing that I will tweak and change things and move with my kids' interests and needs as they arise. Preparation is helpful. A schedule is not something I feel inclined to stick to, especially in this current environment. We don't have a storytime to get to at the library or an event at the museum or even a playdate at a friend's house. And in some ways that's kind of nice. Being able to move at our pace at any given moment is helpful. It's also a little disorienting after a while (like after 3 months...) so a routine is helpful. For us, that's a series of repeated events or types of activities we rotate through on a weekly basis. Some refer to that as a weekly rhythm. We change ours from time to time, but for the most part during the last few months, it's looked like this:
Mad Science Mondays --where we've explored various science topics and experiments
Library/Storytime Tuesdays -- where we "visit" our home library and the kids select books to check out (and bring downstairs) for the week and then we have a home storytime with a particular theme and related activities or a particular book and related activities
Artful Wednesdays--where we do some sort of directed art activity, project or longer term study (we recently wrapped up a month long study of color theory)
Homegrown and Handmade Thursdays-- where we do some sort of activity related to our garden, kitchen or hand crafting
Play Day Fridays-- where we delve a little deeper into dramatic play, sensory exploration or backyard shenanigans
Some days the activity is more structured and fills a specific slot of time (never too long with kids nearly 6 and under). Other days we split up activities throughout the day. Sometimes a day's activity is a one run and done type of thing (like a STEM challenge to build a tin foil boat during our Building Science Unit). Other times, it's an activity that's part of a longer study or theme--like painting vegetables on Wednesday that Peter Rabbit might like to eat during a week long study of rabbits that also included a compost tea garden experiment in our "plant lab" on Monday, an outdoor storytime featuring Beatrix Potter books on Tuesday and then a Peter Rabbit Garden Iced Tea Party for lunch on Thursday.
I don't stress if an activity or theme takes more time nor do I stress if it takes less time or even if it's a complete flop altogether. I like having the basic foundation for a flow of how we spend each day and I think it is also something the kids find calming. But there's no sweat if we veer off course or change course altogether.
We are very fortunate to have outdoor access here and the backyard has become essentially another room in our home. As we transition from the school year into summer, I envision spending even more time there with plenty of breaks to cool off indoors. It is our playroom, our dining room, our laboratory, our studio, our classroom and a source of wonder and adventure. It also provides and supplies nearly all of our summer activities--especially this year. I find it helpful to have some basic preparations in place so that we are ready to go with minimal stress and interruption. Here that looks like getting everyone slathered in sunscreen first thing in the morning before our first burst out the back door. We fill water bottles even though we're just a few feet from the kitchen. I keep a tote bag with our basic outdoor supplies that can't be kept outside hanging on a closet doorknob just behind the back door so I grab it, stash our things in a tin basin and we're ready to go.
Some of our "basics" include our nature journals, some field guides or other relevant books, and supplies for drawing/writing/documenting. I also stash in other materials as needed for activities or just plain exploration.
My rule of thumb is that just about anything you can do indoors you can take and do outdoors. Sometimes that involves a bit of creativity. Some other basics I keep at the ready are a large blanket for sitting on, an extra bin or basket for collecting any trash or dirty picnic dishes, and a towel or two for drying wet spots or hands after a rinse at our outdoor hand-washing station (which is just a bar of soap in an old section of pantyhose hanging from a garden hook, water from our jug and a cup for filling and pouring).
Get to YES. This is my mantra when it comes to parenting and teaching. The world of a child is filled with limits and "no's" and "not that way's" and "not yet's." And while those are all a healthy and realistic part of the world, when I can, I like to get to YES. It also mitigates a lot of the battles that ensue after one too many "no's" leaves a child feeling frustrated, powerless and combative. Additionally, some of the gut reactions I have to immediately say "no," can be completely mitigated when I wait and watch. So our space here is a little messier than some and my kid maybe resembles the one on the cover of I Ain't Gonna Paint No More by Karen Beaumont, but getting to YES on this particular occasion meant that Y explored mixing colors, pouring and created rather a stunning work of art in the end!
Had I immediately said "no" when he began to pour and balance tiny glass dessert cups one on top of the other, I would have completely cut off his unique and intentional exploration and completely missed this stunning result. But aside from learning to embrace the space and bless this mess, finding ways within my own limits and boundaries to support theirs helps us all to get through the day more smoothly and promotes a world of wonder and curiosity that nurtures their growing minds.
Let's PLAY! This year has been monumental. It was a first year of kindergarten for S. A first year of preschool for Y. A first year of life for C. And a first pandemic for, well, all of us. We need this summer to be a time to decompress. While there's always worry about "summer slide" and skill loss, this year there is likely even more concern for children who have been out of traditional classrooms for the better part of 3 months and will accrue at least 3 more before returning. I'm a big proponent of the idea that children learn through play and natural curiosity. So I'm following their whims this summer while sneaking in a bit of wonder. We have just begun meeting some fantastic animal friends through a little bit of imaginative play, storytelling, literature and mail.
Mail? Yes, Notes from Nature. Each week the kids receive a special delivery from an animal, a plant, a tree, a flower, a bug or a rock or maybe a seashell eager to make their acquaintance as we explore our backyard and the vast world beyond it. It began with a letter from a very friendly eastern cottontail rabbit as we learned about rabbits and hares and heard some great stories by Beatrix Potter and Thornton Burgess. This takes them into a world of whimsy but also gives them factual information of various species of flora and fauna both nearby and farther away. These adventures in science and literacy are rounded out by explorations of art, cooking/practical life skills, movement through obstacle courses and neighborhood nature walks and even math.
Math? Yes, math! But not with worksheets and definitely not inside. We just pack it up and take it with us with our "Math on the Go" Kit. I made it somewhat more with S in mind as he's really quite enjoyed kindergarten math--but today Y and I took a Counting Walk to a wooded area near our home and he collected 1 stick, 2 pansies, 3 leaves, 4 pine cones and 5 little rocks. He loves counting. He loves collecting. He didn't even know he was learning!
It will take a bit more ingenuity to meet the kids' needs for movement and socialization this summer--but one muscle that is surely going to get its workout is their imaginations. Whether it's an afternoon of playing "Harry Potter" with wands made from painted sticks, Quidditch Brooms made from fallen branches and dried grass, and colorful capes made from old tea towels--or just a half dead bouquet of cut flowers set out with their mud kitchen and some colored water before it meets its final deposit to the compost tumbler--these days are about setting up the kids for setting their own stage. They are the narrators, the actors and the audience in this show and with or without a pandemic in the background, the show must go on!
Favorite Tried and True Tips: This summer and all year round for that matter, I recall and tap into some of my favorite tools of the trade.
- Just Add Water. For just about every challenge you might face in the course of a lifetime or even one hour--water usually helps. Thirsty? Tired? Hot? Bored? Kids fighting? Dirty? Messy?Got a boat? Just add water. Yes, add a little water and an empty cup is more than half full. Add a little water and all that dirt becomes a glorious mud kitchen. Add a little water and that wilting garden, kid, husband, dirty laundry pile, comes right back to life. Water play is fun for kids (and adults) of all ages and a great activity for multi-aged groups. No pools? No problem. Even a giant bowl can make for hours of fun...
- Use what you have. This summer more than any other, we really are limited to using what we have on hand or can easily access. So we stretch our imaginations instead of our wallets a little more right now. Great souvenirs cost nothing at all if you ask my stick and stone collecting kiddos. All three of the kids are obsessed with the "recycles" bin (as S calls it). And less is more. We swap things in and out a little more frequently now that we are always home, but absence makes the heart grow fonder and something stashed away for a bit feels brand new again when it comes back to the toy shelf or sandbox.
- Don't reinvent the wheel. Novelty is lovely, but not every hour of every day needs to be filled to the brim with it. It's OK to repeat activities. Often. Each time a child explores the same thing, they have an opportunity to delve deeper and take it to a new level. We've repeated science experiments, sensory bins, dramatic play themes and art activities here over and over and over again. Sometimes it's because someone asks for it, other times I initiate it. And you don't have to overthink it all--in fact, sometimes the less thinking I do "for them," the more thinking they do for me! I've learned a lot about play ideas from watching and listening to kids, especially my own. Even when I do prepare an activity, a play setup, an art project--many times the kids will take it entirely in their own direction and I love to be privy to that. I'm even luckier if I'm invited to join them in it! And does it take a load off of me? Yup!
- The simpler things... You don't have to pull out the rolling pins and cookie cutters and icing and sprinkles and hours of labor between prep and cleanup to cook with your kids. Let them join you in choosing one recipe for the bread they will eat this week. Or have them help you make this next batch of playdough. Have them help wash and dry the lettuce--whether it's from your garden or your crisper bin. Let them help you with the dinner you're making anyway. Do kids love iced sugar cookie cutouts? Yes! But is that what they're seeking every time you hit the kitchen? No--it's really the closeness and connection and the honor in their competence even though they are small and require a step stool to reach the kitchen counter. And you can totally count that as an activity. We are putting together a binder with our favorite recipes for food and play so we have it all handy. I like to have at least one of the boys help me out on Sunday choosing and preparing one for the week ahead, but even C is thrilled to join us anytime in the kitchen for whatever task she can get her hands (or mouth) on to help with.
I'll try not to be a stranger to these parts as we slip into summer days here. It's certainly been an adjustment to go from being out and about, in school buildings and offices to being in all the time together attending classes, appointments and meetings from the dining room, the couch, the kitchen, the yard and even the minivan. It will be yet another adjustment not having kindergarten in the kitchen and preschool at the dining room table come Monday morning! But one of the many silver linings has been the opportunity to see my kids really dig deep into their play and exploring and finally feeling like I have "the time" to do all of these things I've so wanted to do with them for so long. In the meantime, I've also completely revamped my outdoor playgroup that met in parks for going on three years to a virtual group that now includes a curbside lending library of over 75 Nature on the Go Kits for kids ranging from infancy on up so a bit of that play and wonder can still reach other homes and yards. And I will aim to tweak activities and ideas I post here to work within the plethora of circumstances families are finding themselves in during these times.
It is important now more than ever to be kind to ourselves and patient. To do our best in any moment and know that this is enough. There are no "should's" when it comes to getting through and if this blog and others like it are sources of support and inspiration, I'm sure glad to share it! But also know that the pictures and ideas you see here are representative of my own form of self care. I enjoy planning play activities and it's a hobby. If it's not your hobby, that's fine! Unstructured play led by and created by the child is inherently valuable to their growth and development. And know that plenty of that happens here as well. There are times I'm checked out on my phone, glued to my couch, sitting on a lawn chair, eating Skinny Pop out of the bag and wondering why it hasn't lived up to its name. My husband does nearly all the cooking. The laundry is never done. I haven't made a sourdough starter. I have raised my voice on many occasions and not just to sing the "daddy shark" verse in Baby Shark. May we all come out of this whole, healthy and happy! I'll be back soon to share some more about this year's Sprout Scouts Camp misadventures and until then...
Happy Playing!
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