If you have been around this blog for a while, you know that chinuch has already begun here--but S will nonetheless celebrate his upshernish (also called upsherin, referring to a boys' third birthday and first haircut) at the end of this month, corresponding to the 6th day of the Jewish month of Tammuz. We have talked for some time about this upcoming milestone and celebration. He has seen some of his friends already celebrate their upshernish. I may be more nervous than he is about the whole first haircut part, but as with any big change (or little one), we are preparing for it through play. When he is three, S will begin to wear a yarmulke and tzitzit all of the time. We bought some in advance and he is already very eager and excited to wear them--particularly since they are decorated with some of his favorite things, like trains and Elmo. We talk about him wearing a yarmulke and tzitzit and having a short hair cut just like Tatty (his dad) and just like some of his friends. Many families have a huge party to honor this occasion and invite guests to help with the honor of cutting a boy's hair for the first time. For a variety of reasons, including S's disposition, we have opted to do this in phases and to keep the hair-cutting part a bit closer to home (and maybe a local kids' salon if that doesn't go as well as planned). He will get his hair cut in our home with just the immediate family, while playing a fun Aleph-bet (Hebrew alphabet) Scavenger Hunt game I constructed by printing off and laminating a color image of the aleph bet--and so he should always know the sweetness of learning Torah, his game pieces will be one of his favorite sweets, jellybeans! Many families use honey or chocolate syrup or another candy their son likes. We will be making a trip the following month to visit family in NY, including his great grandmother who has been waiting and waiting with anticipation for this special day. We could not bring her to his upshernish, so we are bringing the upshernish to her! We were not sure he would take so well to having his hair cut the first time by relatives he doesn't get to see so often and since we certainly do not want it to be an unpleasant experience for any of the parties involved, we will give GG the honor of the second hair cut and a family celebration. We plan to invite S's friends for a post-birthday play party later in the summer when we return to celebrate his having turned three and reached this special milestone.
In the meantime, S is very excited about cupcakes. He wants either a bicycle or a lawnmower for his birthday. He is eager to fulfill the mitzvos that come with turning 3; some may be easier than others in reality, and we will continue to encourage and support him through those adjustments. We are playing and reading about haircuts and having an upshernish, and if you're looking for some of our favorite books and activities on the subject, here's a few:
- S loves playdough! We printed and laminated some people playdough mats from this website to use with playdough and playdough scissors. S loves to give them wacky hairdos and subsequently, haircuts. You can also use these with laminated cut outs of a yarmulke and tzitzit as well as clothes/accessories and with velcro practice dressing up as a big boy!
- S also loves scissors. I'm shocked (and grateful) we haven't already had an accidental or unplanned first haircut! He loves this tray of "upshernish mentchies," little people he can give haircuts to that I made by drawing faces on recycled toilet paper tubes and cutting slits for hair.
He loves cutting their hair and keeping a tray or basket underneath aids with collecting the scraps for easier clean-up afterward. I showed him how to set the scissors and upshernish mentchies to the side and carry the tray to the garbage can to empty before putting everything back in and away on his art shelf. - We love the books below! There are a variety of books on the topic of having and preparing for an upshernish and secular books on the topic of first haircuts. Here are three of our favorites:
- We do a lot of dramatic play as well. S has seen his Tatty cut his hair and likes to play about it and pretend.
It's sometimes hard to believe I will only fight my way to put all this hair in a ponytail for a short while longer. For soooo long, even when dressed in the most masculine of outfits, S has been mistaken for a little girl when we are in public! (Ironically, for quite some time S only used the pronoun "she" when talking about others!) On the occasions I happen to correct someone, people are so apologetic. I always jokingly say that soon enough, he will grow into some of those more 'boyish' behaviors and I will miss my little girl. The truth is that I love all of S's personality traits. I love his eagerness to learn and try new things. I love his enthusiasm for life. I love his sensitivity and cautiousness. I love that he likes to pick flowers and find rocks and that he likes to dance and play music everywhere, on everything. I love that he is naturally kind and generous. And I even love that he is stubborn and determined like I am--because I know that those traits, reigned in, will carry him far in life. I mostly love that loves to play. Many a bedtime battle here happens because he wants to play! I cannot help but feel that a little bit of my little baby is disappearing with that ponytail, and I kind of want the snuggly part of that little baby boy to last just a little bit longer...maybe forever... And I am so proud and excited for the milestone that turning three marks in a Jewish child's life. S has always had a love for learning. May this sense of wonder carry him through life wrapped in the love of Torah just as he will be wrapped in a talis and carried through his cheder (Jewish school). Until and beyond then, we will be here, happily playing!
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